farmers jokes puns

207+ Farmers Jokes [Puns]

Farmers jokes or puns often use wordplay and humor to make a playful connection between agriculture or farming and everyday life.

Here are some common characteristics of farmers jokes:

  • They often involve puns or wordplay: Farmers jokes typically involve wordplay or puns, where a word or phrase is used in a way that has a double meaning, often involving some aspect of farming or agriculture.
  • They play on stereotypes: Farmers jokes often play on stereotypes associated with farming, such as rural living, farm animals, and the hard work involved in farming.
  • They are often simple and straightforward: Farmers jokes are usually simple and straightforward, often relying on a clever play on words rather than complex humor.
  • They can be self-deprecating: Farmers jokes can be self-deprecating, poking fun at the farmer’s own profession or way of life.
  • They are often relatable: Farmers jokes are often relatable to anyone who has a basic understanding of farming or agriculture, but they can also be enjoyed by those who are not familiar with these industries.

Overall, farmers jokes are a fun and lighthearted way to poke fun at the world of farming and agriculture, while also highlighting the hard work and dedication of farmers.

We have hundreds of farmers jokes and puns to choose from in this article.

Let’s take a look.

Farmers Jokes

Here are 30+ farmers jokes:

  1. Why did the farmer win an award? Because he was out standing in his field.
  2. What do you call a lazy farmer? A SLOTH-er.
  3. Why did the farmer name his pig “Ink”? Because it kept running out of the pen.
  4. How do farmers count their cows? With a cow-culator.
  5. What do you get when you cross a snowman and a farmer? Frosty the Hayman.
  6. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? “Where’s my tractor?”
  7. What did the farmer say to the horse when he fell down? “Get up, hay!”
  8. Why did the farmer start a band? Because he wanted to raise a-crop-aella.
  9. What did the pig say when he found a dictionary? “Oh look, a new sow-rce of knowledge!”
  10. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
  11. What do you call a cow that’s just given birth? Decalfinated.
  12. Why did the farmer bury all his money in the field? To grow his net worth.
  13. Why did the farmer plant a seed in his car? Because he wanted to grow a convert-ible.
  14. Why did the chicken join the band? Because he had drumsticks!
  15. What did the farmer say to the duck who stole his wallet? “Quack, give it back!”
  16. What do you get when you cross a farmer and a vampire? A corn-stalk-ula.
  17. Why did the scarecrow go to the gym? To work on his straw-bod.
  18. What do you get when you cross a farmer with a snowman? Frosty the Haybale.
  19. What do you get when you cross a farmer and a detective? A farm-investigator.
  20. Why did the farmer buy a new bull? Because the old one was pasture his prime.
  21. What do you call a group of cows playing instruments? A moo-sical band.
  22. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the cucumber in its red dress.
  23. Why did the farmer feed his cows money? Because he wanted rich milk.
  24. What do you get when you cross a farmer and a dinosaur? A stegosourus.
  25. Why did the farmer bring a ladder to the barn? To milk the cow on the roof.
  26. What did the farmer say when he saw his cow give birth to triplets? “Well, that’s udderly amazing!”
  27. What do you call a cow that plays an instrument? A moo-sician.
  28. Why did the farmer put a bell on his cow? Because his horns didn’t work.
  29. Why did the farmer name his cow “Eileen”? Because she walks through fields of green.
  30. What do you call a farmer who’s also a magician? A cropdini.

Farmers Puns

Below are 30 farmers puns:

  1. Why did the farmer run a steamroller over his potato field? He wanted mashed potatoes.
  2. What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
  3. Why did the farmer feed his pigs sugar and vinegar? He wanted sweet and sour pork.
  4. How do farmers party? They turnip the beet!
  5. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
  6. Why did the farmer bury his money in the field? To make his soil rich!
  7. What do you call a cow that’s just given birth? De-calf-inated!
  8. Why did the farmer plant a light bulb? He wanted to grow a power plant.
  9. What did the farmer say to the horse when it fell down? “Get up, hay?”
  10. What do you call a farmer who’s always lying? A-corn-artist!
  11. Why did the farmer plow his field with a music player? He wanted to rock the soil!
  12. What do you call a group of cows playing instruments? A moo-sical band!
  13. What do you call a chicken that’s afraid to cross the road? Chicken-hearted!
  14. Why did the farmer start a punk band? He wanted to raise some cain.
  15. Why did the farmer start a knitting business? He wanted to grow his own yarn.
  16. Why did the farmer start a flower shop? To make some hay while the sunflowered.
  17. What do you call a donkey that sings country music? A honky-tonkey!
  18. Why did the farmer start a limo service? So he could have a field trip.
  19. What did the farmer say to his cow when it started singing? “Stop it, you’re udderly out of tune!”
  20. What do you get when you cross a farmer with a skunk? A smell-a-tractor!
  21. Why did the farmer install a bell in his tractor? He wanted to hear it ring.
  22. What did the pig say to the farmer when he was taken to the butcher? “I’m bacon for mercy!”
  23. Why did the farmer’s dog chase its tail in the barn? It was trying to catch up on some tail-wagging.
  24. Why did the farmer plant seeds in his couch? He wanted to grow a sofa crop.
  25. What do you call a farmer who dances? A haymaker!
  26. What did the farmer say when he lost his hoe? “Where’s my hoe, I have to make some ground!”
  27. What do you call a farmer who’s always on the phone? A tele-cow-municator!
  28. Why did the farmer cross the road? To get to the udder side.
  29. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? “Where’s my tractor, I have to mow!”
  30. Why did the farmer decide to study at university? To get a degree in agriculture.

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Farmers Jokes for Kids

Farmers Jokes for Kids:

  1. What do you call a farmer who is always lying? A fib-er-culturist.
  2. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
  3. What did the baby corn say to the mama corn? “Where’s popcorn?”
  4. Why did the farmer feed his cows money? He wanted to have rich milk!
  5. Why don’t farmers tell jokes? Because they always crop up!
  6. What did the duck say when it bought lipstick? “Put it on my bill.”
  7. Why did the farmer plant a seed in his ear? He wanted to grow a corny joke.
  8. What do you get when you cross a farmer with a ghost? A scare-crow.
  9. Why did the chicken join a band? To play the drum-sticks.
  10. What do you call a farmer that can do magic? A Hocus-Crocus.

Farmers Jokes for Adults

Farmers Jokes for Adults:

  1. Why did the farmer quit his job? He realized he was just ploughing a dead horse.
  2. Why did the farmer bring a ladder to the barn? He wanted to milk the cows on the top shelf.
  3. Why did the farmer plant a light bulb? He wanted to grow a power plant.
  4. What do you call a farmer who is also a musician? A crop and roll artist.
  5. Why did the farmer’s wife leave him? Because he was too busy sowing his wild oats.
  6. Why did the farmer’s son study law? So he could learn how to sue the dairy for milking him dry.
  7. What did the farmer say to the corn on the cob? “Do you want to be husked or shucked?”
  8. Why did the farmer cross the road? To get to the other crop.
  9. Why did the farmer put a bell on his cow? Because her horn didn’t work.
  10. What do you call a farmer who raises cows with no legs? Ground beef.

Farm Animal Jokes

Farm Animal Jokes:

  1. What do you call a cow that plays music? A moosician.
  2. Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.
  3. What do you get when you cross a cow and a duck? Milk and quackers.
  4. What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop.
  5. Why did the sheep go to the dentist? To get her ewe-teeth fixed.
  6. What do you get when you cross a sheep and a kangaroo? A woolly jumper.
  7. Why did the horse go on a diet? Because he was a little horse.
  8. What did the snail say when it caught a ride on the back of a turtle? “Wheeeee!”
  9. Why did the rooster go to the gym? He wanted to work on his peck-ular muscles.
  10. What did the mama cow say to the baby cow? “It’s pasture bedtime.”

Funny Farmers Jokes

Funny Farmers Jokes:

  1. What do you call a farmer who’s always on the phone? A tele-hay-venist.
  2. Why did the farmer’s wife start a clothing line? She wanted to create her own hen-thusiastic fashion.
  3. What do you call a farmer who is good with a pitchfork? A fork-lifter.
  4. Why did the farmer go to therapy? He had a crop of problems.
  5. What do you call a farmer who is also a poet? A corn-versationalist.
  6. Why did the farmer bury his money in the field? He wanted to grow rich.
  7. Why did the farmer win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
  8. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field too!
  9. What did the mama cow say to the baby cow? “It’s pasture bedtime!”
  10. What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer!
  11. Why did the farmer plant a seed in his ear? He wanted to grow a corn on the cob!
  12. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
  13. Why did the farmer put his cow on the roof? Because he wanted to have a rooftop moo-vee!
  14. What do you call a cow that’s just had a baby? De-calf-inated!
  15. Why did the farmer feed his chickens gunpowder? He wanted them to lay explosive eggs!
  16. Why did the farmer install a bell on his tractor? Because he wanted to hear some “crop music”!

Agriculture Jokes

Agriculture Jokes:

  1. Why did the wheat farmer get a drone? To crop-dust his crops with high-tech precision!
  2. What do you call a cow that’s a math genius? A moonician!
  3. Why did the farmer cross the road? To get to the other crop!
  4. Why did the tomato blush? Because it saw the zucchini naked!
  5. What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it just let out a little whine!
  6. Why did the farmer’s wife bury her phone in the garden? Because she wanted to grow a smartphone tree!
  7. Why did the farmer get lost in his own field? Because he was corn-fused!
  8. What do you call a farmer who raises dogs? A collie-farmer!
  9. Why did the farmer start a dance party in his cornfield? Because he wanted to see some cornography!
  10. Why did the corn stalk break up with the soybean plant? It just wasn’t ear-y enough!

Ranch Jokes

Ranch Jokes:

  1. Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? He wanted to get a long little doggy!
  2. Why did the horse cross the road? To get to the hay bale on the other side!
  3. What do you call a cowboy’s fart? A rootin’-tootin’!
  4. Why did the rancher install a mirror in the pasture? So he could see his herd!
  5. What do you call a cowboy who’s always on the move? A mobile-home on the range!
  6. Why did the cowboy break up with his girlfriend? She was always horsing around!
  7. Why did the cowboy take a loan from the bank? To buy a stud horse that was a mane attraction!
  8. What do you call a cowboy who’s been stuck in the saddle for too long? A raw-hide!
  9. Why did the cowboy buy a dalmatian? He wanted to have a fire pup!
  10. Why did the cowboy get a new belt? Because his old one had a worn-out buckle!

Harvest Jokes

Harvest Jokes:

  1. Why did the scarecrow go to the pumpkin patch? To get a pumpkin patch kid!
  2. What do you call a pumpkin that’s a perfect circle? Round!
  3. Why did the apple tree break up with the pear tree? Because it was tired of the peer pressure!
  4. What did the grape say when it got squished? Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
  5. Why did the farmer bury his money in the garden? He wanted to grow some cabbage.
  6. Why did the farmer’s daughter bring a ladder to the apple orchard? She wanted to pick apples from a higher tree-titude!
  7. What do you call a haunted pumpkin patch? A ghostly gourd-ian!
  8. Why did the farmer need a new truck for harvest season? His old one couldn’t handle the crop-load!
  9. Why did the corn go to the doctor? Because it had an ear infection!
  10. Why did the farmer get a gym membership during harvest season? So he could work on his squash and beans!

Short Farmers Jokes

Short Farmers Jokes:

  1. Why did the farmer plant a seed in his television? He wanted to grow a plasma TV.
  2. What do you call a farmer who is always out in the field? Outstanding in his field.
  3. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
  4. What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop.
  5. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the farmer walking up with a salad dressing.
  6. Why did the farmer name his pig “Ink”? Because it always ran out of the pen.
  7. What did the farmer say to the cow that was sitting on the fence? “Get off the fence!”
  8. How do you know if a farmer is tech-savvy? They use a lot of Silicon Valley.
  9. What do you get when you cross a farmer and a magician? Hay presto!
  10. Why did the farmer bury his money in the field? He wanted to sow his cash crops.

Farmer Dad Jokes

Farmer Dad Jokes:

  1. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
  2. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the farmer walking up with a salad dressing.
  3. Why don’t farmers trust banks? Because they always like to keep their money in the soil.
  4. Why did the farmer install a bell in his field? Because he wanted to hear his beans ring.
  5. What do you call a cow that has just given birth? De-calf-inated.
  6. Why did the farmer put a bell on his cow? Because his horns didn’t work.
  7. Why did the farmer call his cow “Temptation”? Because he wanted to milk her.
  8. Why did the farmer start telling jokes? Because he wanted to crop people up.
  9. Why did the farmer stop telling jokes? Because they were corny.
  10. Why did the farmer cross the road? To get to the udder side.

Farmer One-Liners

Farmer One-Liners:

  1. A farmer never misses a beet.
  2. The best way to save money on groceries is to grow your own bacon.
  3. I tried to start a chicken farm, but all the eggs were over-easy.
  4. My dad is a farmer, but he’s also a huge fan of corny jokes.
  5. The farmer was cross because he had a lot of acreage to plow.
  6. A farmer’s market is where you can find fresh produce and a lot of tractor talk.
  7. A successful farmer is one who knows how to milk his cows and not his customers.
  8. I asked a farmer if he had a chicken that could lay square eggs. He said, “No, but I have a rooster that can crow about it.”
  9. If you’re ever feeling down, just remember that farmers always have something to look forward to – the harvest.
  10. My dad always says, “A farmer’s work is never done, but neither is the satisfaction.”

Corny Farmers Jokes

Corny Farmers Jokes:

  1. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? “Where’s my John Deere?”
  2. Why don’t farmers ever give up? Because they always have a good crop.
  3. What did the farmer say when his cow gave birth to twins? “I guess two calves are butter than one.”
  4. Why did the farmer put his pig on a diet? Because it was a little oink-verage.
  5. What did the farmer say when he caught his tractor smoking? “You better not be diesel-ing with me!”
  6. Why don’t farmers tell jokes about cows? They’re udderly ridiculous!
  7. What did the corn say when it was complimented? Aw, shucks!
  8. What do you call a farmer who’s always on the move? A roamin’ farmer!
  9. What do you get when you cross a farmer and a magician? Hay presto!
  10. What’s a farmer’s favorite way to listen to music? With his ear of corn!
  11. What do you call a chicken that’s afraid to cross the road? Chicken-hearted!
  12. What do you get when you cross a farmer and a vampire? Count Spudula!
  13. Why did the farmer feed his cows chocolate? He wanted sweet milk!
  14. What do you call a group of cows playing instruments? A moo-sical band!
  15. What do you get when you cross a farmer and a snowman? Frosty the Hayman!
  16. Why did the farmer bury all his money in his field? To make his soil rich!
  17. What do you call a scarecrow that’s good at its job? Outstanding in its field!
  18. Why did the farmer give his pig a shower? To make him squeal clean!
  19. What do you get when you cross a farmer and a dinosaur? Tricera-crops!
  20. What did the farmer say to the horse when he fell down? Hay, now!
  21. Why did the farmer plant a seed in the ground? To see it grow into a money tree!
  22. What do you call a group of pigs on a hot day? Sweating ham!
  23. Why did the farmer go to the doctor? Because he had a corn on the cob!
  24. What do you get when you cross a farmer and a computer? A mega-bite!
  25. Why did the farmer go to the bank? To get his chickens insured!

Barnyard Jokes

Barnyard Jokes:

  1. Why did the cow cross the road? To get to the udder side!
  2. What did the pig say when he got a sunburn? I’m bacon!
  3. What do you call a sheep that’s always crying? A ewe-nique!
  4. What do you call a duck that loves to tell jokes? A quack-up!
  5. Why did the horse go to the doctor? Because he was a little hoarse!
  6. What do you get when you cross a sheep and a kangaroo? A woolly jumper!
  7. What do you call a group of goats singing together? A bleatles tribute band!
  8. Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide!
  9. What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pork chop!
  10. Why did the cow go to outer space? To visit the moooon!
  11. What do you call a sheep that can sing? A ewe-nique vocalist!
  12. What do you call a cow that plays an instrument? A moosician!
  13. Why did the pig go to the casino? To play some slop machines!
  14. What do you call a group of cows that play basketball? The Dairy Airs!
  15. What do you get when you cross a sheep and a porcupine? An animal that knits its own sweaters!
  16. Why did the rooster go to the gym? To work on his pecks!
  17. What do you call a group of ducks that loves to dance? The Quack-a-doodle-doo crew!
  18. Why did the chicken go to the seance? To talk to the other side!
  19. What do you call a sheep that’s always on the move? A lamb-in-motion!
  20. Why did the pig go to the hospital? He needed a ham-putation!

Farmer Sayings (Humor)

Farmer Sayings:

  1. “If you want to make a small fortune in farming, start with a large one.”
  2. “A farmer’s work is never done, but his bank account usually is.”
  3. “The farmer is the only man in our economy who buys everything at retail, sells everything at wholesale, and pays the freight both ways.”
  4. “A farmer’s breakfast is a chicken, two eggs and a side of tractor grease.”
  5. “Farming: where the hours are long, the work is hard, and the tractor seat is often more comfortable than the office chair.”
  6. “The only time a farmer is ever on vacation is when he’s driving his tractor to the next field.”
  7. “A good farmer is nothing more than a handyman with a sense of humus.”
  8. “Why did the farmer win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.”
  9. “Farming: the only profession where you can work 24 hours a day and still be broke.”
  10. “A farmer’s greatest asset is his manure management skills.”

FAQs – Farmers Jokes

What is some farmer humor?

Here are some examples of farmer humor:

Puns

  1. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
  2. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
  3. Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.

One-liners

  1. Why did the farmer bury all his money? He wanted to raise some crop circles!
  2. Why did the farmer buy a Dalmatian? He wanted to breed his own firewood.
  3. Why did the farmer cross the road? To get to his combine harvester.

Jokes

  1. What do you call a cow that’s just given birth? De-calf-inated!
  2. Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? Because they lactose.
  3. Why don’t cows wear flip flops? Because they moo in the grass.
  4. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
  5. What do you call a lazy farmer? A plowdiddly.
  6. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the farmer dressing.
  7. How do you make a farmer’s day? You give him a bale of hay.
  8. What do you get when you cross a farmer with a DJ? Farm Aid.
  9. Why did the farmer feed his pigs sugar and vinegar? He wanted sweet and sour pork.
  10. What do you call a farmer who dances? A hoe-down.

Observations

  1. Farmers have a lot of field experience.
  2. Farmers are experts at producing crops and raising livestock, but they may not know much about city life.
  3. Farmers have a lot of patience, as they have to wait for their crops to grow and their animals to mature.

What did the crop say to the farmer?

“Hay there! Can you give me a hand? I’m feeling a little corn-fused!”

How do you know when a tractor is angry?

When a tractor is angry, it throws a tractor tantrum!

Conclusion

Farmers jokes or puns often revolve around wordplay that involves agricultural terms, practices, and rural life.

Some common characteristics of these jokes include:

  • Use of homophones: Farmers jokes often use words that sound the same but have different meanings, known as homophones. For example, “Why did the farmer feed his cows money? He wanted rich milk.”
  • Use of double entendres: These jokes often use phrases that have a double meaning, one of which relates to farming or rural life. For example, “Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.”
  • Incorporation of farm animals: Jokes often feature farm animals such as cows, pigs, chickens, and sheep, and their behavior or characteristics.
  • Satire of rural life: Some jokes use humor to poke fun at the perceived simplicity or rustic nature of rural life, such as “Why did the farmer install a bell in his tractor? He wanted to hear it ring.”
  • Playful exaggeration: Jokes often use exaggeration to create a humorous effect, such as “Why did the farmer install a sauna on his farm? So he could have a sweatshop.”

Overall, farmers jokes rely on clever wordplay and playful exaggeration to create a lighthearted and humorous depiction of rural life and agriculture.

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