Mustache Jokes & Puns

209+ Mustache Jokes & Puns [All Categories]

Mustache jokes and puns are a type of humor that revolves around the concept of mustaches, which are hair growths that typically grow on the upper lip area of the face.

Here are some common characteristics of mustache jokes and puns:

  • Wordplay: Mustache jokes and puns often use wordplay to create humor. This involves using puns, double entendres, and other forms of linguistic humor to make a joke or create a funny scenario.
  • Absurdity: Many mustache jokes and puns are absurd, meaning that they involve situations or scenarios that are unlikely or improbable. This type of humor often relies on exaggeration or surrealism to create a comedic effect.
  • Irony: Mustache jokes and puns often rely on irony to create humor. This involves using a situation or scenario that is the opposite of what is expected or predicted, which can be funny and surprising.
  • Stereotypes: Mustache jokes and puns often rely on stereotypes about people who wear mustaches, such as men who are considered to be rugged, tough, or manly. This type of humor can be used to subvert or challenge these stereotypes, or to play with them in a humorous way.
  • Visual Humor: Many mustache jokes and puns are visual in nature, meaning that they involve images or illustrations that are funny or humorous. This can include cartoons, memes, or other types of visual media that incorporate mustaches in a humorous way.

Overall, mustache jokes and puns are a playful and lighthearted form of humor that can be used to entertain and amuse people in a variety of settings.

We’ve got hundreds to look through in this article.

They are hairy good so I mustache you to read them all 🙂

Mustache Jokes

Mustache Jokes:

  1. Why did the man shave off his mustache? He wanted to turn over a new leaf.
  2. What did the mustache say to the beard? “I mustache you a question.”
  3. Why don’t ants have mustaches? Because they don’t want to look like their uncles.
  4. Why did the man get a mustache tattoo on his finger? So he could put his finger on his lip and pretend to have a mustache.
  5. What do you call a mustache that’s always getting in the way? A hairy situation.
  6. Why did the mustache go to the dentist? To get a root canal.
  7. Why did the mustache go to the barber? To get trimmed and proper.
  8. How does a mustache drink its coffee? With a lip-stache.
  9. What do you call a mustache that doesn’t belong to you? A facial faux-pas.
  10. Why did the man with a mustache refuse to shave? He didn’t want to be mistaken for his twin brother.
  11. Why did the hipster shave his mustache? He didn’t want to be mainstream.
  12. Why did the football player grow a mustache? To help him tackle his opponents.
  13. What did the mustache say to the razor? “You don’t have the edge on me.”
  14. What do you call a mustache that’s always on the move? A roving lip-rug.
  15. Why did the cowboy have a mustache? To keep his upper lip warm on cold nights.
  16. What do you call a mustache that’s out of control? A wild hair.
  17. Why did the detective have a mustache? So he could easily blend in with the crowd.
  18. What do you call a mustache that’s too long? A hairy snake.
  19. Why did the scientist have a mustache? To conduct experiments on its growth rate.
  20. What do you call a mustache that’s a work of art? A Mona Lisa Lip.

Bill Burr on Fireman Mustaches

Mustache Puns

Mustache Puns:

  1. My mustache is so big, it needs its own zip code.
  2. I mustache you to lend me a razor.
  3. If you’re looking for a good time, you can always count on my mustache.
  4. My mustache is my secret weapon.
  5. A mustache is just a beard’s little brother.
  6. I may be clean-shaven now, but I mustache you a question.
  7. A mustache is the ultimate symbol of manliness.
  8. My mustache is like a fingerprint – unique and unmistakable.
  9. I mustache you a question, but I’ll shave it for later.
  10. My mustache is the envy of all the men in the room.
  11. My mustache is so thick, it can stop a bullet.
  12. I mustache you a question, but I’ll shave it for later.
  13. My mustache is the glue that holds my personality together.
  14. I mustache you to hold my beer while I shave.
  15. My mustache is the ultimate power move.
  16. I mustache you to stop staring at my upper lip.
  17. My mustache is my calling card.
  18. I mustache you to keep it classy.
  19. My mustache is so thick, it has its own gravitational pull.
  20. I mustache you to take me seriously, but not my mustache.

Funny Mustache Jokes

Funny Mustache Jokes:

  1. Why did the man with the mustache cross the road? To get to the other side of the mustache.
  2. What’s the difference between a mustache and a Ferrari? Not everyone can afford a Ferrari.
  3. Why did the hipster’s mustache go viral? Because it had a social media account.
  4. Why did the magician grow a mustache? So he could pull it off.
  5. Why did the mustache go to Hollywood? To audition for a role in a movie.
  6. What do you call a group of mustaches? A lip sync.
  7. Why did the pirate have a mustache? To hide his treasure map.
  8. What did the mustache say when it walked into the bar? “I mustache you to serve me a drink.”
  9. Why did the mustache get a job at the circus? To work in the facial hair department.
  10. What do you call a mustache that’s also a spy? A mustache-tache-tache.
  11. Why did the astronaut grow a mustache? To blend in with the aliens.
  12. What do you call a mustache that’s a fan of heavy metal? A lip shredder.
  13. Why did the firefighter grow a mustache? To keep his upper lip safe from the flames.
  14. What did the mustache say to the eyebrows? “Why the long face?”
  15. Why did the mustache go to the gym? To work on its curl game.
  16. What do you call a mustache that’s a pickpocket? A lip-stick.
  17. Why did the mustache go to the bank? To make a facial deposit.
  18. What did the mustache say to the razor? “Don’t cut me off!”
  19. Why did the boxer have a mustache? To intimidate his opponents.
  20. What do you call a mustache that’s also a comedian? A lip-smacker.

Mustache Jokes – One-Liners

Mustache Jokes – One-Liners:

  1. I used to have a handlebar mustache, but it got too heavy to lift.
  2. A mustache is just a beard’s little brother.
  3. I once tried to shave my mustache, but I couldn’t face it.
  4. My mustache is like a small pet that lives on my face.
  5. My mustache is my wingman.
  6. My mustache is so big, it needs its own postal code.
  7. I mustache you a question, but I’ll shave it for later.
  8. My mustache is the ultimate conversation starter.
  9. My mustache is my personal grooming assistant.
  10. A mustache is like a good wine – it gets better with age.
  11. My mustache is my badge of honor.
  12. I once tried to trim my mustache with a chainsaw. It didn’t end well.
  13. My mustache is the key to my confidence.
  14. My mustache is the ultimate icebreaker.
  15. I mustache you to take me seriously, but not my mustache.
  16. My mustache is my secret weapon.
  17. My mustache is like a superhero’s mask.
  18. My mustache is my best friend.
  19. My mustache is my signature look.
  20. My mustache is my life coach.

Dirty Mustache Jokes

Dirty Mustache Jokes:

  1. Why did the woman leave her mustachioed lover? Because she couldn’t handle the tickling.
  2. What do you call a mustache that’s been around the block? A seasoned pro.
  3. What did the mustache say to the beard? “I’ve got more experience than you.”
  4. Why did the man with a mustache go to the strip club? To show off his “upper lip” skills.
  5. Why did the woman with a mustache refuse to shave? She liked the extra stimulation.
  6. What’s the difference between a mustache and a penis? One is a facial feature and the other is a phallic feature.
  7. Why did the woman fall for the man with a mustache? Because he knew how to use it.
  8. What do you call a mustache that’s always getting in the way? A nuisance.
  9. Why did the man with a mustache go to the dentist? To get a cavity filled.
  10. Why did the woman with a mustache go to the doctor? To get a prescription for hair removal cream.
  11. What do you call a mustache that’s too long? A hazard to public health.
  12. Why did the man with a mustache go to the gym? To work on his tongue curls.
  13. What do you call a mustache that’s been in a fight? A battle-scarred warrior.
  14. Why did the woman with a mustache refuse to kiss her partner? Because it felt like kissing a bristle brush.
  15. What do you call a mustache that’s also a sex toy? A tickler.
  16. Why did the man with a mustache go to the doctor? To get a prescription for Rogaine.
  17. What do you call a mustache that’s on fire? A hot mustache.
  18. Why did the woman with a mustache refuse to wear lipstick? It clashed with her facial hair.
  19. What’s the difference between a mustache and a toupee? One sits on your face and the other sits on your head.
  20. Why did the man with a mustache refuse to shave? He liked the way it made his partner’s thighs feel.

Mustache Dad Jokes

Mustache Dad Jokes:

  1. Why did the man with a mustache go to the barbershop? He wanted to get a handle on his facial hair!
  2. What do you call a mustache that is no longer cool? A has-been-stache!
  3. Why did the mustache wear a top hat? It wanted to be extra fancy!
  4. What do you call a mustache that’s always on the run? A must-dash!
  5. Why did the mustache break up with the beard? It just didn’t want to handle the commitment!
  6. What do you call a mustache that’s also a pirate? A swashbuckler-stache!
  7. Why did the mustache go to the doctor? It was feeling a little hair-azy!
  8. What do you call a mustache that’s always telling jokes? A must-laugh!
  9. Why did the mustache go to school? It wanted to get a higher-education in facial hair!
  10. What do you call a mustache that’s always complaining? A whine-stache!
  11. Why did the mustache cross the road? To get to the other hairy-side!
  12. What do you call a mustache that’s also a detective? A private-stache!
  13. Why did the mustache get lost? It took a wrong turn at the barber-shop!
  14. What do you call a mustache that’s also a musician? A stache-instrumentalist!
  15. Why did the mustache go to the gym? It wanted to work on its must-strength!
  16. What do you call a mustache that’s also a chef? A flavor-stache!
  17. Why did the mustache go to the zoo? It wanted to see the fur-ocious animals!
  18. What do you call a mustache that’s also a magician? A presto-stache!
  19. Why did the mustache go to the park? It wanted to take a stroll on the hairy-side!
  20. What do you call a mustache that’s also a superhero? A cape-stache!

I Mustache You a Question Jokes

I Mustache You a Question Jokes:

  1. I mustache you a question, but I’ll shave it for later.
  2. I mustache you a question, but I nose you won’t answer.
  3. I mustache you a question, but I beard you’re busy.
  4. I mustache you a question, but I lip you’ll know the answer.
  5. I mustache you a question, but I mustache you to keep it a secret.
  6. I mustache you a question, but I beardly know you!
  7. I mustache you a question, but I’m afraid you’ll give me lip service.
  8. I mustache you a question, but I’ll whisker you away with my words.
  9. I mustache you a question, but it’s not my mane concern.
  10. I mustache you a question, but I don’t want to go against the grain.
  11. I mustache you a question, but I’m not sure I can handle the answer.
  12. I mustache you a question, but I don’t want to bristle you.
  13. I mustache you a question, but I don’t want to come off as whisker-y.
  14. I mustache you a question, but I don’t want to rub you the wrong way.
  15. I mustache you a question, but I don’t want to make a hair-y situation.
  16. I mustache you a question, but I’m not sure if I should beard it.
  17. I mustache you a question, but I’m afraid you’ll think it’s a hairy idea.
  18. I mustache you a question, but I don’t want to cause a hairy-scary situation.
  19. I mustache you a question, but I’ll shave it for later if you’re too busy.

Mustache Ride Jokes

Mustache Ride Jokes:

  1. Why did the man with a mustache go on a rollercoaster? He wanted to take a mustache ride!
  2. What do you call a mustache ride that’s also a magical journey? A whisker-ful ride!
  3. Why did the mustache refuse to go on the amusement park ride? It was afraid of getting mustache-whiplash!
  4. What do you call a mustache ride that’s also a bumpy road trip? A hairy adventure!
  5. Why did the mustache go on a Ferris wheel ride? It wanted to get a bird’s-eye view of the world from its top lip!
  6. What do you call a mustache ride that’s also a thrilling experience? A hair-raising ride!
  7. Why did the mustache go on a merry-go-round ride? It wanted to feel like it was going in mustache circles!
  8. What do you call a mustache ride that’s also a romantic experience? A love-stache ride!
  9. Why did the mustache go on a water slide ride? It wanted to make a big mustache splash!
  10. What do you call a mustache ride that’s also a wild journey? A whisker-tastic ride!
  11. Why did the mustache go on a haunted house ride? It wanted to get a spooky mustache thrill!
  12. What do you call a mustache ride that’s also a scenic trip? A hairy sightseeing tour!
  13. Why did the mustache go on a zip-line ride? It wanted to feel like it was flying with its facial hair!
  14. What do you call a mustache ride that’s also an adrenaline rush? A mustache rush!
  15. Why did the mustache go on a go-kart ride? It wanted to feel like it was driving a mustache-mobile!
  16. What do you call a mustache ride that’s also a relaxing experience? A whisker-dream ride!
  17. Why did the mustache go on a giant slide ride? It wanted to get a long, curly mustache slide!
  18. What do you call a mustache ride that’s also a fast-paced adventure? A hair-pin turn ride!
  19. Why did the mustache go on a bumper car ride? It wanted to bump mustache-bumpers with others!
  20. What do you call a mustache ride that’s also a fun activity for the whole family? A family-stache ride!

Handlebar Mustache Jokes

Handlebar Mustache Jokes:

  1. Why did the handlebar mustache go to the gym? It wanted to pump some iron with its facial hair!
  2. What do you call a handlebar mustache that’s also a bike? A pedal-stache!
  3. Why did the handlebar mustache go to the saloon? It wanted to show off its western flair!
  4. What do you call a handlebar mustache that’s also a rock star? A hair-band-stache!
  5. Why did the handlebar mustache go on a road trip? It wanted to feel the wind in its facial hair!
  6. What do you call a handlebar mustache that’s also a detective? A sleuth-stache!
  7. Why did the handlebar mustache go to the library? It wanted to check out some books on facial hair history!
  8. What do you call a handlebar mustache that’s also a chef? A flavor-stache!
  9. Why did the handlebar mustache go to the concert? It wanted to show off its rockin’ facial hair!
  1. What do you call a handlebar mustache that’s also a pilot? A fly-stache!
  2. Why did the handlebar mustache go to the barber shop? It wanted to get a trim and look sharp!
  3. What do you call a handlebar mustache that’s also a magician? A presto-stache!
  4. Why did the handlebar mustache go to the beach? It wanted to get a suntan on its facial hair!
  5. What do you call a handlebar mustache that’s also a superhero? A cape-stache!
  6. Why did the handlebar mustache go to the museum? It wanted to see some ancient artifacts of facial hair!
  7. What do you call a handlebar mustache that’s also a cowboy? A wild-west-stache!
  8. Why did the handlebar mustache go to the circus? It wanted to join the act as a human mustache-tache-o!
  9. What do you call a handlebar mustache that’s also a businessman? A money-stache!
  10. Why did the handlebar mustache go to the race track? It wanted to watch the mustang cars go by!
  11. What do you call a handlebar mustache that’s also a teacher? A lesson-stache!

FAQs – Mustache Jokes

What are some funny mustache jokes?

Here are some funny mustache jokes:

  1. Why did the hipster burn his tongue? He drank his coffee before it was cool.
  2. What do you call a mustache that can play the piano? A handlebar maestro.
  3. Why did the man with a mustache go to the dentist? He needed a filling, but he didn’t want to shave his ‘stache.
  4. How do you know if someone has a mustache? They’ll tell you.
  5. What do you call a fake mustache? A mustachio.
  6. Why did the man with a mustache cross the road? To get to the other sideburns.
  7. How does a mustache get in shape? It does a lot of lip-ups.
  8. What’s the difference between a mustache and a lawnmower? You can’t ride a mustache.
  9. What do you call a mustache on a bald man? A lonely caterpillar.
  10. Why did the mustache fail its job interview? It didn’t have enough experience.

What are some good mustache puns?

Here are some mustache puns:

  1. I mustache you a question, but I’ll shave it for later.
  2. That’s quite a hairy situation. I mustache you to help me.
  3. My mustache is my best facial hair asset. It’s my mane attraction.
  4. Mustache rides are all the buzz these days.
  5. A mustache is just a facial hairstyle, but a beard is an attitude.
  6. I tried to trim my mustache, but I ended up shaving it all off. Now I’m a mustacheless wonder.
  7. If you’re not feeling confident, just grow a mustache. It’ll help you face the world.
  8. Why did the mustache join the circus? It wanted to become a juggle-stache.
  9. I don’t always grow a mustache, but when I do, I prefer the handlebar style.
  10. A good mustache is like a fine wine. It gets better with age.

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